I’ll admit it – I like (ok, somewhat love) reality TV. It is addicting – out of my control. I could blame it on the networks airing nothing else BUT reality TV, but I won’t.  I just like it. Who wouldn’t love watching cat fights over one man, or rich girls shopping ’till their hearts content? My husband. That’s who.

There have been times, I’ve been watching a show (ie: VH1’s Brett Michael Rock of Love) and had my finger on the “channel back button” just in case Chris popped his head in the room. I just don’t want to hear that each show I’m watching is “the worst thing I’ve ever seen” one more time. Does he think I enjoy Twins baseball 7 nights a week?  I personally think baseball could be “the worst thing I’ve ever seen“.  How long does it really take to throw a pitch?  Do they have to think about it that hard?  I just don’t get it. Going to a game at the stadium may be one thing (there’s beer involved), but to watch it on TV 4 hours a night, 7 days a week? Come on.

So, I know that there is no educational value in reality TV (is this REALLY why we watch TV?), and most of it is not really reality, but sometimes a peak into other people’s lives can be interesting, dramatic and pure entertainment.  It sure is more fun to talk about real people on your lunch break than fictional characters.  It makes the drama so much more. . . well. . . real.  And for a girl who lives a pretty drama-free life, I need my daily dose.

Just for fun, here are my top 10 favorite reality TV shows, past and present:

1. American Idol – even Chris watches this, but claims it’s not reality TV. It’s a “contest”. Right.

2. Top Chef

3. Real World

4. Top Model (one of Chris’s all time least favorites, but it’s been on 11 seasons so it must be good)

5. The Girls Next Door

6. Dancing with the Stars (a recent addition this last season)

7. Anything on HGTV

8. Beauty and the Geek (I know, I know)

9. The Hills – thank you MTV for this guilty little pleasure

10.  I love New York – and all spin offs, to be quite frank.

Although I know Chris’s argument against reality TV will be much more compelling, I just have to admit I like it. And I think millions of Americans agree with me, whether they like to admit it or not.  And just so Chris doesn’t go on his soap box and say he never watches reality TV, here a few shows I have caught him watching in the last month or so:

1. The First 48

2. Deadliest Catch

3. Dog the Bounty Hunter

4.  The Real World, yes The Real World

5. American Idol

This soon changed. Shortly after our move to our new home, and an upgrade to a King size bed, the dogs started making an appearance once again on our lovely, new, king sized mattress.  There was severe protest from my side, mostly because I had just bought new sheets for the bed and I remembered the destruction that took place to our old sheets (now on one of our guest beds, he -he). For the most part, Chris respected my thoughts on the matter and left the dogs on the floor.  Or so I thought…..

One day I came home after a particularly long day at work and Chris approached me in the hall outside of the bedroom with a sheepish look on his face. His first words were, “Don’t be mad, OK?”  Never a great way to start out a conversation.  He proceeded to tell me Sophie had chewed a hole in the middle of our new, expensive comforter.  Of course, I questioned him how this was possible since our bed was so high I could barely get on it at night, let alone our top-heavy shelties.  Turns out, when I was leaving in the morning for work, Chris was lifting the shelties up onto the bed for a late morning snooze.

So for a while, the dogs steered clear of the bed…but they are back and I’m not sure how we got there again. Sure, I love animals and snuggling just as much as the next person but it seems that on the floor snuggling would satisfy me for the day.  So here I present my evidence as to why puppies should NOT be allowed to partake in a couple’s sleeping arrangements:

Exhibit A:  Chewed sheets/pillows/comforters.

Chewed sheet corner

Although our girls are pretty much past the chewing stage, every once and a while I catch them gnawing on a corner of the sheets. This may be that they are nervous, stressed or just plain neurotic. I don’t really care, my sheets all have chewed corners now. In fact just recently, Sophie chewed a gigantic whole in our “green room” guest sheets while Chris watched a football game – not even a corner, a huge gaping whole. How he was oblivious to this, I will never know, I think it is a man thing.

Exhibit B: Dog hair in your bed

Gross picture, but needed to be illustrated

Have you ever woke up with a hair ball in your mouth? If not, I don’t recommend going there. Shelties aren’t exactly known for their shed-free coats. (Although I did tell my mother this in high school in order to acquire my first sheltie. She did NOT do her research and believed her 14 year old daughter instead – silly mom)

Exhibit C: Destruction of furniture (scratch marks)

Furniture destruction by the claws of the puppies

The foot of our bed has hundreds, if not thousands, of scratch marks in it from the shelties when they think it is time to get down.  Again – top-heavy dogs should not be jumping from the bed so they must be lifted down. Another perk of owning a sheltie. And if someone is out in the kitchen making food – well – expect more than one dainty “I would like to get down please” scratch.

Exhibit D: Massive take-over of space!

Even in pre-Sophie days, where am I supposed to sleep???

Recently, the girls have learned to respect my side of the bed. I think they sense my hatred of the whole “family bed” idea. I am a terribly light sleeper and not so pleasant when I don’t get a solid 8 hours.  However, they feel like Chris’s side of the bed is their domain. Like they deserve to be sleeping in a Tempur-Pedic.  I often awake in the middle of the night to Chris breathing on the back of my neck. Then I figure out that I am practically falling off my side of the bed. When I rise to survey the situation, I find the dogs have completely taken over his side, forcing him onto my side. Leaving the two of us to share half of a king (half of a king = a twin).  And god-forbid I try to move them back to the floor in the middle of the night when they have overtaken Chris’s half. I have been growled at (by Mia only) and once or twice I have seen teeth bared at me for an attempted move.  ARE YOU KIDDING ME?

So in the end, I feel I make very good points as to why the “family bed” should NOT include dogs (or kids for that matter, but that’s another subject completely).  If you would like to read Chris’s opinion on the subject, please click on the link marked “tags” to be taken directly to his point-of-view. Although I can’t imagine you would need to after all of my compelling evidence…