I think it’s time to Ferberize
July 28, 2009 by Lisa Beth
So, this is a total controversial subject for a lot of parents. Do you let your kids cry it out when they are waking in the middle of the night, or do you get them to sleep by any means BUT letting them cry, even if this means sacrificing your own sleep and sanity? I choose sanity. Brooklyn has developed, in my mind, some bad sleep habits. From the time she was 5 weeks old she started sleeping through the night. However, a little over a month ago she started getting up again in the middle of the night. It started with one time per night, but now she is up almost every 2-3 hours ALL NIGHT LONG.
When Wyatt was a baby, he went through a similar situation. Great sleeper for a couple of months, then up again. I know kids go through these phases, but I feel like we might need to go through the same steps we did when Wyatt started getting up. The big problem? I have kind of created my own monster. Instead of letting Brooklyn fuss a little bit when she started waking up again, I just immediately started going into her room and shoving a bottle in her mouth so she wouldn’t wak up Wyatt. I now see that that was not the best idea. She now NEEDS me to come into her room and put her back to sleep instead of going back to sleep on her own.
I just spent the last hour trying to let Brooklyn “cry it out” when I put her down, and frankly, it was just too sad. I ended up rocking her to sleep. Mostly because it was keeping Wyatt up. He kept screaming from his room, “Moooommm! Tell Brook-a-lyn to BE QUIET!” Tonight, when inevitably she gets up, I think I might try our favorite sleep method, The Ferber method. Our version of Ferberizing is one recommended by our pediatrician. When the baby wakes in the middle of the night, let them fuss for 10 minutes. Then go in their room, let them know you are there, say a few comforting words,etc. then leave. Wait 10 minutes and repeat until the child has basically screamed herself to sleep. The next night you stretch the interval to 12 minutes, and the next night 15 minutes. When our pediatrician suggested this to us, he handed me his pager number and said, “If by the third night, Wyatt is NOT sleeping through the night, you call me. ANY TIME. I tell all my patients this and I’ve never been called.” I thought he was nuts, or had given me a fake number, but since I worked at the hospital I was able to verify (it was right!). I never did have to call him.
Since this was successful when Wyatt was a baby, I have high hopes, but of course am still skeptical just ‘cuz that’s my personality. So wish me luck! And if you see me tomorrow and I look like a zombie, forgive me, I am a working mom with two kids.
Patty on Wed, 29th Jul 2009 10:48 am
What a sad, sad picture of the most smiley baby on the planet.
P.S. We never “Ferberized” you — you would go for hours and never, ever give in, so you were rocked A LOT.
But………….good luck, we know you and Wyatt need your sleep.
Theta Mom on Wed, 29th Jul 2009 1:31 pm
I have to say, we let both of our kids cry it out. It lasted about 4-5 days of sheer agony, but the countless nights of uninterrupted sleep that we gained was ALL worth it. It’s such a personal choice that each family must be comfortable with. Thanks for your response through twittermoms. Hope you check out my blog as well.